“BEFORE YOU WORSHIP” Part 2

Mark 11.12-26

I once delivered a series of Sunday morning messages from God’s Word addressing the topic of forgiveness. At that time, I explained the pagan understanding of forgiveness. Perhaps it would be better for me to phrase it as the “pagan misunderstanding of forgiveness,” since unsaved people have only a severely distorted notion of forgiving others.

I also pointed out the beginnings of God’s revelation to the Jewish people regarding this matter of forgiveness, observing that even in the Old Testament, the idea of forgiveness is only infrequently mentioned, not fully explained, and forgiveness is usually asked of someone occupying a superior position. Little or no mention is made of seeking the forgiveness of someone’s equal.

It is in the New Testament, as the duty and an obligation of every believer in Jesus Christ, that forgiveness is revealed to be intrinsic to the Christian lifestyle. For believers, forgiveness is sought and granted based upon the penalty for sins having been paid by the Lord Jesus Christ on the cross of Calvary, “forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.”[1]

I revisited the matter of forgiveness, examining the various words in the Bible that convey truth about forgiveness and gaining a more precise understanding that forgiveness is always based on something. That something is the requirement that wrongdoing be punished, not merely ignored.

The basis for any Christian’s ability and willingness to forgive someone is the suffering and dying of the Lord Jesus Christ for our sins, thereby freeing us to forgive others as we have been forgiven our own sins.

There was also a third consideration of the importance of forgiving. In that message, I not only detailed the necessity of forgiving repeatedly, but also the role that the believer’s faith plays in forgiving and being willing to forgive again and again.

Thus, we saw that reestablishing a relationship damaged by someone’s wrongdoing is a spiritual struggle that requires both toughness and determination, with God’s grace. Why so? Because both the believer and that brother or sister whose forgiveness is either sought or given are far from perfect. Additionally, what if they are not mindful of the biblical proprieties involved? In such cases, the result will oftentimes be a severe testing of our humility.

I hope that the truths of forgiveness are settled in our minds and hearts. It is in the heart that a believer’s faith resides to be lived in daily conduct. The question is then begged: Have you sought another believer’s forgiveness recently? Have you recently granted forgiveness to another believer?

I ask because it hardly seems likely that you don’t need to request or grant forgiveness. Would you not agree? After all, we who follow after the Savior do commit sins against each other, do we not? Therefore, we need to forgive and be forgiven.

We took up the matter of forgiving last Sunday morning in a message titled “Before You Worship, Part 1.” My text for that message was Matthew 5.23-24, a portion of our Lord’s Sermon on the Mount. In brief, that portion of God’s Word addresses the child of God preparing to worship God, following the scenario that the Lord Jesus Christ described.

If, on your way to worship God, you remember that a brother or sister has aught against you (presumably thinking you have somehow wronged him or her), put that which you are bringing to the altar to offer down, and before seeking to worship God, be first reconciled to that offended brother.

Only then are you free to worship God. Thus, the Lord Jesus Christ’s illustration of the principle involves a worshiper who realizes that another believer thinks he has done him wrong. Reasonable Christians agree that we who enjoy the blessings of God’s forgiveness have the awesome privilege of seeking and granting forgiveness to other members of the family of God.

We learned that it is such an exalted privilege to engage in this ministry of reconciliation that it takes immediate precedence over worshiping God when you realize that you need another’s forgiveness because of a real or perceived wrong done.

However, that’s not all of it. Not only are we obligated to seek reconciliation with someone who thinks we have done wrong, but we are also obligated when we have done nothing wrong, yet realize that someone has wronged us.

Considering those things, please turn to Mark chapter 11 at this time. Being mindful that the Sermon on the Mount was delivered near the beginning of our Lord’s earthly ministry in Galilee, the passage to which we now turn describes events and records instructions our Lord delivered near the end of His earthly ministry, only three days before His crucifixion outside the city of Jerusalem.

Allow me to briefly review key events to establish the context for your understanding. Eight days before His crucifixion, the Lord Jesus Christ was in Jericho, where He spoke of His death, healed blind Bartimaeus and his companion, and visited the home of Zacchaeus.

The next day, He traveled from Jericho toward Jerusalem. Along the way, He discreetly separated from His fellow travelers to stay behind in Bethany at the home of Mary, Martha, and Lazarus while the crowd of pilgrims continued to Jerusalem. Although not mentioned in the Gospels, He spent the Sabbath before His crucifixion, a Saturday, with His friends and apostles in Bethany.

On the Sunday before, He entered Jerusalem on the back of a never-before-riden donkey colt, fulfilling Old Testament prophecies both as to the timing of His entrance and the manner of His entrance. Known as the Triumphal Entry, the common folks celebrated His entrance while the religious leaders scorned Him.

The next day, Monday, He cursed a fig tree that bore no fruit, cleansed the Temple for the second time (remember, He had done so three years earlier), and then met with certain Greeks who had been brought to Him by Philip and Andrew.

It was while meeting with them that God spoke audibly, John 12.27-33:

27 Now is my soul troubled; and what shall I say? Father, save me from this hour: but for this cause came I unto this hour.

28 Father, glorify thy name. Then came there a voice from heaven, saying, I have both glorified it, and will glorify it again.

29 The people therefore, that stood by, and heard it, said that it thundered: others said, An angel spake to him.

30 Jesus answered and said, This voice came not because of me, but for your sakes.

31 Now is the judgment of this world: now shall the prince of this world be cast out.

32 And I, if I be lifted up from the earth, will draw all men unto me.

33 This he said, signifying what death he should die.

Can you imagine being one of Christ’s twelve apostles with the events of those few days on your mind and having just heard the voice of God once more? Three of the men with Him (Peter, James, and John) had listened to the voice of God three times now, at John’s baptism, on the mount of transfiguration, and on that Monday before His crucifixion in Jerusalem. How do you sleep after such experiences? I guess that you don’t.

The next morning, Tuesday, walking back to Jerusalem from Bethany, they passed by the fig tree their Master had cursed the day before. From Mark 11.20, we learn that as they passed the fig tree their Lord had cursed the day before, Peter noticed that the tree had already withered.

Interesting to note in the next verse is what the Lord Jesus Christ then said to them all:

“And Jesus answering saith unto them, Have faith in God.”

The Lord proceeded to state the connection between faith and prayer with the very familiar comment about the faith to move mountains. That is in Mark 11.23-24 and deserves an entire sermon of its own.

My interest is in this theme of forgiving that is of such importance to us, found in Mark 11.25-26, in connection with the Lord’s comment moments before to “have faith in God.” If you have those two verses located, I invite you to stand to read them with me:

25 And when ye stand praying, forgive, if ye have ought against any: that your Father also which is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses.

26 But if ye do not forgive, neither will your Father which is in heaven forgive your trespasses.

Several sermons can be developed from these two verses. One sermon could be created on the posture of prayer, with our Lord here describing someone praying while standing. A sermon could also be developed on the connection seen here before Christ’s death on the cross of your forgiveness when you are wronged and God forgives your trespasses.

However, my immediate concern is having faith in God and the imposition by the Lord Jesus Christ on His disciples of the requirement that you forgive someone who has sinned against you as you approach God in prayer.

You are aware of the need to seek forgiveness before worshiping. Yet, this passage makes no mention of worshiping, but only of praying. Where is the connection? Here is where context rules. The Lord Jesus Christ was speaking to His men in Jerusalem, either in the Court of Gentiles in the Temple or as they approached the Temple. The topic of conversation is prayer as a means of expressing faith in God. Thus, everything about the context is infused with faith and the notion of worship.

What, then, should we be mindful of, not as believers who, on our way to worship, remember someone who has aught against us, but as someone who remembers as we prepare to pray that we have aught against someone else? Remember, as well, the recent admonition to “have faith in God.”

There are three things I would urge upon you from the perspective of a believer with faith in God, who has been wronged by another believer. Has someone wronged you? If that person is a believer, and especially if that person is a member of your Church, remember:

First, REMEMBER THAT LOVE COVERS A MULTITUDE OF SINS

We understand that we are to, first, love God, and, second, to love others as we love ourselves. Amen? What does the practical outworking of that ideal look like when it comes to loving others?

Proverbs 10.12:

“Hatred stirreth up strifes: but love covereth all sins.”

The person who tells you what you do not need to hear hates you, while the person who loves you will not stir up trouble. Love someone by not stirring up trouble in their life.

Proverbs 17.9:

“He that covereth a transgression seeketh love; but he that repeateth a matter separateth very friends.”

The person who repeats to you what he heard about you is destroying your friendship with another person. Love someone by not telling them what they do not need to hear.

Genesis 9.23:

“And Shem and Japheth took a garment, and laid it upon both their shoulders, and went backward, and covered the nakedness of their father; and their faces were backward, and they saw not their father’s nakedness.”

Two of Noah’s sons demonstrated their love for him.

First Corinthians 13.4-7:

4 Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up,

5 Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil;

6 Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth;

7 Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.

James 5.20:

“Let him know, that he which converteth the sinner from the error of his way shall save a soul from death, and shall hide a multitude of sins.”

First Peter 4.8:

“And above all things have fervent charity among yourselves: for charity shall cover the multitude of sins.”

These six passages from the Old and New Testaments show the effect of your love (sometimes translated as charity) in your dealings with another’s sins. And how many of us have eagerly swept away every consideration of wrongdoing done to us when an offender has turned from his wicked way and trusted Christ? You give the guy a fresh start. Amen?

This understood, there are approaching a dozen moderating passages that reflect the tragic reality that our love is not perfect, and others frequently present real challenges to our love for them.

Romans 12.17-18:

17 Recompense to no man evil for evil. Provide things honest in the sight of all men.

18 If it be possible, as much as lieth in you, live peaceably with all men.

Galatians 6.10:

“As we have therefore opportunity, let us do good unto all men, especially unto them who are of the household of faith.

Philippians 4.5:

“Let your moderation be known unto all men. The Lord is at hand.

First Thessalonians 3.12:

“And the Lord make you to increase and abound in love one toward another, and toward all men, even as we do toward you.”

First Thessalonians 5.14 15:

14 Now we exhort you, brethren, warn them that are unruly, comfort the feebleminded, support the weak, be patient toward all men.

15 See that none render evil for evil unto any man; but ever follow that which is good, both among yourselves, and to all men.

First Timothy 2.1:

“I exhort therefore, that, first of all, supplications, prayers, intercessions, and giving of thanks, be made for all men.”

Second Timothy 2.24:

“And the servant of the Lord must not strive; but be gentle unto all men, apt to teach, patient.”

Titus 3.2:

“To speak evil of no man, to be no brawlers, but gentle, shewing all meekness unto all men.”

Hebrews 12.14:

“Follow peace with all men, and holiness, without which no man shall see the Lord.”

We are to seek everyone’s benefit. Our love should be expressed with courtesy, kindness, gentleness, and moderation (which is reasonableness). That said, the Apostle Paul did qualify with the phrases “if it be possible,” “as we have therefore opportunity,” and “follow peace with all men.”

What are the takeaways from these passages? Love covers many sins committed against you by other people. Love may even cover most sins committed against you by someone else. However, your love does not always cover every sin committed against you. Some sins committed against you are matters you must take up and deal with.

How does a Christian know which sins should be dealt with and which sins committed against you by someone else should be forgotten, covered by your love? Allow me to present some guidelines.

Next, REMEMBER THAT SINS AGAINST YOU THAT YOU PERSIST IN THINKING ABOUT ARE SINS YOU MUST DEAL WITH

Has a believer in Jesus Christ ever done you wrong? If the answer to that question is “No,” you are either very young in the faith, or you have been around very few Christians, and they have always been a distance from you. First John 1.8 is undeniably evident in insisting that Christians, all Christians, commit sins. And when we sin, we sin against other people.

So, how do you know for sure that you have sufficient love to cover that believer’s sin against you? That is the question. Here is a simple test to determine if your love has sufficiently covered another’s sin against you, or you need to address the matter before you go to the Lord in prayer. Does the sin committed against you repeatedly come to mind? Have you convinced yourself that you have forgiven and forgotten, but you can’t get it out of your mind?

If that is the case, it is an issue that your love has not resolved. You have not truly forgiven, as evidenced by your inability to forget the offense. It troubles you just enough to surface from time to time. Not to worry. No condemnation. I would suggest that you take that as the Lord’s gentle nudging, indicating that you need to approach the person who sinned against you so that the two of you can resolve the matter.

“Bill, I need to talk to you about a matter that I thought was no big deal, and that you may not think is a big deal. But try as I will, I cannot get past what you said to me the other day. Please don’t think I'm being petty, but I feel troubled in my spirit because what you said was hurtful to me in a way I didn't appreciate at the time. So, what can we do about it?”

Please be mindful that this is a matter that is yours to deal with, and not someone else’s problem. This is a sin committed against you by someone else, not a sin committed against someone else that you observed or took offense to. Proverbs 26.17 speaks to something between other people that is really none of your business:

“He that passeth by, and meddleth with strife belonging not to him, is like one that taketh a dog by the ears.”

If you persist in thinking about something person A did to person B, but did not do it to you, we are dealing with a whole other issue. Go ahead and pray. The person A to person B matter is not your immediate concern. Not suggesting that if you detect a pattern in a believer’s life that needs to be addressed, you ignore it. Galatians 6.1 provides guidance for you to follow at an appropriate time and place:

“Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a fault, ye which are spiritual, restore such an one in the spirit of meekness; considering thyself, lest thou also be tempted.”

However, please note that this is a separate issue altogether. Our present focus is related to your immediate concerns. What about matters related to someone’s treatment of your spouse or your children? Well, are they adults? Then, treat them as adults. Unless the issue involves physical harm, it is generally best to let an adult address a concern with another adult without disrespecting them by intruding on an opportunity God has given them to grow in response to a challenge they face. I have a very protective personality. That said, it is disrespectful to my wife and daughter for me to take offense or intrude into a matter between them and another person that involves no threat of physical harm. So, I avoid virtue signaling in favor of showing respect for God’s ability to bless my wife and daughter in their private matters.

Finally, REMEMBER THAT SINS AGAINST YOU THAT OTHERS PERSIST IN THINKING ABOUT ARE SINS YOU MUST DEAL WITH

Sometimes, someone has sinned against you, but you have successfully dealt with the matter in the privacy of your own mind and heart, and through a season of prayer. You hold no animus toward the offending person, and you never think about it anymore. But perhaps you are sensitive enough to recognize that the person who sinned against you is now distancing himself from you.

Understand that your love for him has rendered the matter dealt with and over, so far as you are concerned. Your love for and liking of that person remain undiminished. However, that person’s behavior toward you has changed, and you detect that he is gradually distancing himself from you. Your concern is that he knows he has sinned, has determined that he will not deal with his sin against you properly, and he is emotionally detaching from you as a way of avoiding the jabbing of a guilty conscience. What he does not realize is that he is searing his conscience by reacting to his sin in that fashion. I could not tell you how many people I think have left our Church over the years for precisely that reason. It is second only to wimpy men whose bossy wives have dragged them away.

Thus, your concern comes to be not the original sin that he committed against you. Instead, it is now his improper response to his sin against you, his reluctance to address the matter, or his outright refusal to deal with it, that is searing his conscience and creating distance. I find it amazing how often this happens with people and how infrequently Christians recognize it for what it is.

I could write a book about people who have stopped attending Church here, not because they have been wronged, but because they have wronged someone. Rather than deal with their own wrongdoing, resulting in a seared conscience, they stop coming. It is sometimes called ghosting, and it’s the practice of ending a personal relationship with someone by suddenly and without explanation withdrawing from all communication. What the people who do that do not recognize is that it is not new, #1, and that the spiritual damage such behavior causes, primarily self-inflicted, is considerable, #2.

Therefore, at the risk of offending someone whose sensitivity is real, you need to approach the person who has done you wrong if you suspect the matter is on his mind and is causing him to detach from you, so that you can encourage a reconciliation and perhaps prevent that person from seriously searing his conscience.

We do so frequently sin against each other, as believers presently trapped in these bodies of flesh, that if the indwelling Spirit of God did not give us love, we would live our lives constantly offended by every little thing. Thankfully, we have been given love to cover or forgive most of the slights and offenses we receive.

However, some cuts are deeper than others. Some wounds catch us a certain way. The occasional dart is guided to a most tender place by a foul spirit. The result is an inability to forgive, as evidenced by the matter repeatedly coming to mind and causing us trouble.

When that happens, especially as you prepare to pray, you need to forgive the offender’s sin truly. If you cannot, you must approach the offender and initiate reconciliation.

Even if you have forgiven the offense, but detect that the person’s wrong against you (though forgiven by you) is creating an estrangement that threatens your relationship, your love for each other, and a willingness to continue serving God together, you need to resolve the matter with the offender.

Understand, sins never just go away. You can pretend sins were not committed, but not successfully. They have to be dealt with. And if the other person does not act upon his sin against you, help him to do that for his own well-being. Of course, faith in God is required.

You might wonder why a Christian doesn’t want to talk to someone about a sin he committed against them that keeps resurfacing in his thoughts. It’s simple. We are cowards. I will admit it.

We are afraid that approaching someone about a sin he committed against you will be rebuffed, that you will be scorned or ridiculed, that he will react by saying, “Really? You are upset about that? Wow, you must be really insecure.”

All it takes not to address a matter we ought to deal with is imagining what might happen. Again, faith in God is required.

That is where love comes into play once more. We must love God enough that our fear of an imagined response will not deter us from doing what God wants us to do. First John 4.18 reveals to us that “perfect love casteth out fear.” How do we know? Trust in God.

Of course, if you are not a Christian, you do not trust God. To have faith in God, you must first have faith in Christ by trusting Him for the forgiveness of your sins.

Then, once God has forgiven you, you will be enabled by God to have the faith in God and the love of God that will make forgiving other people truly possible.

And how much more important are such matters for married couples? Husbands and wives must learn to both seek and to grant forgiveness, which cannot truly happen until they know the Savior.

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[1] Ephesians 4.32

Before You Worship, Part 2